Can we heal without closure?

Posted by Alina Liao on

A question came up this month that I've been marinating on and journaling about... 

Can you heal from trauma if the person who harmed you is not held accountable? If they don't account for the harm they caused? 

I, too, have wanted and needed accountability from those who harmed me. I have journaled extensively about it in my journaling. 

From one person, though, I know I'll never get that acknowledgement or accountability, let alone an apology, and I don't intend on ever interacting with them again. 

From another, they remain in my life. I want to be able to interact with them without anger, resentment, or pain. I did try telling them how they harmed me. What I got in response was denial. Anger that I would dare imagine that they caused me harm.

So then, as healing as it would be to receive their acknowledgement of the harm they caused, I have had to face the reality of what is. If I wait to get something I'll never get to heal, then... I'll never heal.

I have come to learn through my self-care journaling though, my healing is more important than their owning up to what they did. 

As I write in my journal, my healing is necessary so that I can be there for the people whom I love and who love me.

My healing is necessary for me to love myself.

So, as hard as it is, I must do the hard work of accepting and letting go, using my journaling as a means to do so. But as hard as it is, my healing is worth it. I am worth it.

And your healing is worth it. You are worth it.

With love,
Founder of Zenit
You are worthy of your wellness

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